There’s a circle of pain, it starts with a descending into the dark depths of despair, it drags you down and doesn’t want to let you go..It has no pity, it has no feeling for anything…it just wants you to loose faith in yourself and sink down into it’s waiting darkness, .…Just like toothache you cannot resist to touch the area of pain, to change the depth of the agony, anything is better than the continuous thoughts circling your mind…The past shapes your future and therefore you cannot wipe the memories from your mind, you cry out, you want to let go and never have to relive the memories again.. but nothing prepares you for the Pain, the tears start, the dry sobbing tears of despair, … but suddenly you realise, you can use the pain, use it and rise above it, make yourself more than the sum of your memories, live and do not let the past colour your future…The past is DEAD, you are alive and the rest of your life is waiting for you with open arms, it’s up to you to make sure the arms are friendly ones. Live and learn to forgive the past for it’s hurt, you are not a victim …you are a survivor………….
Pen Pusher, I just write when the mood takes me, and wherever my imagination wants to go I try to follow.... 
● Poems 'n Stuff ● 
yes..
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Another enjoyable peom Pen and yes so true. Sheila x
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Nothing is more certain than change, whether we do something about it or not – everything changes – regardless.
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Learning to push past the pain and enjoy life, nay, thrive even midst the throes, is what you have learned, and you share with others that effervescence, that love of life, even as faeries do, dancing and singing, doing no harm, filling the forest with warmth and love.
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Thank you Dan, not many view this one, Pain, but I am proud of what I’ve accomplished…beaten through the pain barrier and still trying to see life as something that’s not necessarily hurting, just different degrees of feeling… I want to share lightness but there’s always a darker side. and so I have my Poison Pen, to enable me to cast it out when I need to…
xx
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In my humble opinion, this is not a Poison Pen my wicked friend it is the realities of a lifetime, all of us conquering and redefining our way in the wider world that is our own destinies, the truth is my wicked friend is that through knowledge we gain these crucial experiences, not all are pleasant but necessary in order to build our characters, breathing optimism into our psyche… I guess that one can raise the shield of emotion in many ways Lady Pen, offering the sword of injustice to lead the way forwards, leaping beyond the boundaries of hurt and in doing so turning the milestone of a time, of its uncertainty, treading the path, crushing the walls that sometimes feels impossible to breach and yet all within the scope of understanding. Life is like that my wicked friend, you are never going to be alone in the darkness, you are just feeling your way until a brighter vision of the future is realised, and accomplished… Be very well now Lady Pen.
Androgoth
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True My Gothic friend, there is a brighter vision of the future, but sometimes almost despite yourself, your way is partway blocked. There’s a self destruction ability in all of us, though some never come to the realisation. Now and again the memories and thoughts about the past make it difficult to walk forward without the heavy baggage burdening you and trying to drag you down…I have tried to cut loose, but the trouble is wherever you go, you cannot flee your inner self… That is one lesson I have learned, painfully… SO I have tried to face myself and my fears, and I think I have gained a deeper understanding. The above post was written a couple of years ago, … I hope I have grown, not in stature but in knowledge about myself, my strengths and my limitations… Many thanks for your thoughts Andro, very, very much appreciated. Pen
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i think you have a good way of ridding your darker days so does hat mean i can say bu aww fu or ba well maybe not lol il finish those swear words in my own company lol great page xxjen
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It does help sometimes Jen, just to let rip with the words that surge up from deep within… just to get rid of the emotion I suppose. and I have one swear word I keep repeating time and time again… seems to help.. 😉 xx
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i wish i could truffin type xxjen
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oh well, Jen, You’ve surely seen I’m just as bad, sometimes the comment box is full of red under-liners, takes me ages to chuffin` well put it all right. … 😉 xx
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Hi Pen!
Drifting in my own challenges I found this uplifting. It is a great compass and reminder. It is the words that I needed at a time that seemed dark. Peace be with you.
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One of the hard facts-pain can force growth and change-and amazing gifts can come as a result of it-but it sure is no fun going through the shadows-thank you for sharing your thoughts-
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